Phenna Ephrix

Phenna Ephrix was a Starfleet flag officer, having served within the fleet as a physician and counsellor from 2305 until 2477. Upon being honourably discharged on medical grounds in 2477 she held the rank of Fleet Admiral and the position of Surgeon General. She was most well known for the founding of the Starfleet Psychosocial Support Network and the United Federation Humanitarian Committee.

Early Life
The Ephrix family line has a complicated history, one founded in genetics entwined between that of Denobulan and Betazoid DNA and the subsequent fight to restore balance again. Astren Ephrix - head of their family’s matriarchy and one of the leading women in the council of Betazed - thought she was doing well when she found a prospective partner in a Betazoid man named Orren. Children had not been her main focus at the time, of course, far more enveloped in the prospect of midnight rendezvous after midnight rendezvous with this other Betazoid who had such an enigmatic aura. The enigma was not caused intentionally. Rather, it was because this ‘Orren’ was a Q - one of the more mischievous types who loved to interact with mere mortals because he found it amusing. It was typical that after one of said rendezvous that Astren found she had fallen pregnant; and even more typical that Orren had seemingly vanished.

Astren - the steadfast and stubborn matriarch of a family which now only consisted of only her own generation - really did not know what she was getting herself into. If Orren’s endearing but enigmatic personality hadn’t been enough indication that something was off, then perhaps the fact that her daughter was born on the 29th of February 2288 might have been a bit of an omen. Other than that, however, things seemed to be normal. Having been all but abandoned by Orren and left to tend to this child by herself was not the easiest of situations, but Astren had always been one for a challenge. It was as such that she welcomed her daughter Phenna with open determination - and, despite her stubbornness, with love.

Despite being the daughter of a Q, Phenna Ephrix had a relatively normal upbringing. The only indication that something might have been different was the fact that she learned so quickly. It was not as if the toddler cared. Learning to walk did not cause any mischief. All it led to was giving her the ability to wander after butterflies or chase after the neighbour’s dog even though the poor hound would much rather be left alone. As she progressed through nursery and into primary education this proclivity for learning was never highlighted as a downside, instead she was merely marked as a ‘fast learner.’ It was not as if the young girl was tearing through learning materials to the extent the teachers couldn’t keep up and therefore it was not an issue.

It was at the age of eight that issues did begin to present themselves, though. For regular Betazoids they generally began to develop their telepathic abilities from around the age of twelve or thirteen. For hybrids this took longer or did not occur at all - so how strange it was that Phenna had gained the ability to empathically detect emotions by the age of eight, that swiftly being followed by the ability to detect surface thoughts. Then to add to matters there was the newfound ability to detect emotional auras from a location or object to the extent that she could correctly recount the reason behind it. Astren had been completely perplexed, having never seen anything like this before. Everyone else that she spoke to had exactly the same reaction. Now the poor hybrid became more of a case study than anything. It was during these investigations that the local general practitioner found yet another confusing detail. From her parental history it should have meant that the young hybrid’s Betazoid genetics outweighed that of her Denobulan side. Somehow, however, her DNA presented a perfect fifty-fifty split.

Orren had left the family alone for eight years but now there was no way that he could not intervene considering how a mystery was about to unfold. He revealed his true identity to Astren alone, and in response the matriarch had just scoffed and stated it was impossible until Orren had opted to freeze time around them as a demonstration. Needless to say it was quite the revelation, and it was one that Astren did not appreciate. Orren had vanished and left the family alone - and now he had only returned to provide a brief explanation to cover the Continuum’s back. He hadn’t realised that Phenna’s powers would actually manifest despite her being a hybrid. The Q wasn’t exactly happy about it either, and thus came the battle to teach the young girl how to conceal her powers. The majority of it surrounded self-awareness; staying quiet about what you knew, pretending that there was nothing different about you. To young Phenna it seemed like a game of keeping secrets - a game that she played with friends when they confided in her, and a game she was going to win.

Unfortunately it was that this system would end up polarising the mother and daughter. While Phenna was content to abide by the wishes of this enigmatic ‘father’ whom she had never truly known, Astren felt quite the opposite. She had been tricked and abandoned and wouldn’t stand for that, trying to convince Phenna to rebel against these rules in a show of protest against this life that had been imposed upon them by the Continuum. However, this only served to create rebellion in return. No matter how much her mother pushed her over the years Phenna refused to give in. She was the sort of child who would never cause any strife to anyone, the sort who would never hurt a fly; purposefully causing trouble just wasn’t in her nature. The only reason why she ever rebelled against her mother’s wishes was because causing any sort of inconvenience seemed wrong.

Throughout her teenage years she did come to understand the reasoning behind her mother’s actions. It was well known that Astren was the more stubborn of the council on Betazed; steadfast, headstrong, and undeniably independent. Orren had humiliated her and left her without any explanation. Phenna only did as her father said because apparently to do otherwise would mean that people were not safe. There were times that she wished she could assist her mother in this self-imposed quest for revenge - or that was what it seemed like in her own opinion - but she couldn’t bring herself to do it.

The constant strife was difficult to deal with. From a young age, however, solace came in the form of music. The ability to hear everything from the person talking beside you to the wingbeat of a fly was not something that was easy to handle either, deafening and entirely overwhelming. Music, however, now that was different. A love for music became a founding trait. Holding the capability to sing with such an ethereal tone and vocal range resulted in music teachers being more than content to take her under their wing. It was something that offered her comfort and managed to dull down the deafening sensation of the outside world. What was even better was the fact that Astren supported these endeavours - to the extent that, in the future, Phenna was set to become one of Betazed's renowned opera singers.

The hybrid would have followed along with this had it not been for other plans. Music was her saving grace and she did not want to ruin that by turning it into something which was a challenge. As the end of secondary education grew near her mother was content to push her down the route of culture. Phenna had other aspirations. Over the years she had grown tired of the arguments and tired of being told who to be. She had never been a truly rebellious person but that frustration still existed and quite rightfully so. She had come to hold quite the frustration at the fact she had to hide who she was - she had the ability to sense the power of the universe, to feel it at her fingertips, but never to use it. The thing she hated most was watching people suffer and being incapable of doing anything about it. People grew old and died, they suffered from illnesses and had to endure agony after agony. Betazed was hardly a scientific culture and too often they just stood by and let the inevitable play out without proper intervention. Phenna didn't like it.

A medical career seemed to be the smart option. Throughout secondary education she had powered through standard science lessons but they were never good enough; never continuing enough about how to help. If she pursued such a career then she could help change that - even if it was only her own understanding that changed. Anything would be better than nothing. The only issue was how she was going to pursue such a career. Phenna was well aware that her life was all planned out for her by her mother; to go against what the woman wanted had already created a disastrous relationship filled with turmoil. It became rather clear to her that if she wanted to pursue a career of her own then there was no way or doing it on Betazed. Her mother was too high up in the council for her to not be shut down immediately. Solace came in the form of Starfleet who, naturally, conducted recruitment drives for secondary education pupils in their last few years. The trip to Earth in order to take the entrance exam was disguised as a school trip - and by some miracle she was accepted into Starfleet Academy.

The issue then was trying to tell her mother that she was set to leave. How did a person bring up that sort of conversation? Every time she came close to telling she would end up backing down, heart racing and not knowing the words to say. Eventually she got to the stage when she did not have to worry about telling her mother, though, because Astren had found out herself. The woman was well known within Betazed’s society and that extended to within Starfleet’s reach, of course she had heard something. Phenna was confronted by her mother and it was rather obvious that was the right moment to confess, but having not said anything from the beginning and creating this aura of deceit had not done their relationship any good. Astren was all but happy to make the young hybrid pack her bags and depart for Starfleet Academy early, coupled with a warning that unless she was going to get back on the right path again then she wouldn’t be allowed to return.

Phenna had been expecting it, knowing that the relationship between herself and her mother had been on a slow decline for years. It was with the hopes that Starfleet would be the chance at turning over a new leaf that she set out for Earth - and she was right in that it was completely different to anything that she had experienced before. On Betazed her lifestyle had seemed so isolated due to the distance between herself and her mother. At Starfleet Academy there was no physical way to be isolated considering how you shared quarters with four roommates in some sort of eternal forbidden sleepover. Having a mother on Betazed’s council had meant that the approach to life that she was raised into was one where you viewed yourself as better than everybody else, but here everyone was equal and it was perfect. Suddenly she had been presented with the chance to get to make new friends, to learn about new cultures, and to forge her own path in life. It was going to be perfect.

Starfleet Academy
It was with great enthusiasm that she approached learning at the Academy. While there were still classes in standard Starfleet subjects such as shuttlecraft piloting and how to handle a phaser, as a medical student she held the distinct advantage of most of her time being taken up by medical lectures and tutorials. Despite never having had the opportunity to properly pursue the subject before it was one that she delved into immediately. The plan was quite clear to her - she would learn how to help people by legitimate means so she was credible, but if there was anything that could not be treated so easily, then… A little bit of Q magic wouldn’t go amiss.

She was the sort of student who could be found studying late into the night - Denobulan genetics giving an advantage as she didn’t need to sleep - pursuing every topic that she could. The one thing that she did not excel in was the more physical attributes of Academy training. Despite being some sort of immortal being it seemed that presenting in a mortal form was going to cause the same issues that it did to everybody else. The fact that she was rather abysmal at running coupled with a diagnosis of type-one diabetes (and a failure to regulate it properly with medication, and multiple rejections of a new ‘functional’ pancreas) did not create the best circumstances for being good at physical exercise. It was evident from the start that the more academic work was her forte.

Outside of studying she learned to thrive too. To begin with she was distinctly awkward and meek to everyone unless they were her roommates - you had to be relatively open with them considering you shared space with them all the time. One of the main issues came from the fact that she had never learned to speak Standard. Back on her homeworld you spoke the native tongue or nothing at all. Could she understand the movement of energy in the universe? Yes. Could she understand people speaking the main language of the Federation? No. The no was something that was not only frustrating but embarrassing. It led to numerous gatherings being spent hiding in the corner, awkwardly observing instead of becoming embarrassed when having to rely on a universal translator. This was changed during one party when someone actually approached her and found it amusing when she tried to apologise for using the translator. This person was a tactical cadet named James Maclaren.

Jamie, as his nickname was known, was all but a godsend. First he had rescued her from the awkwardness at that party - he was outgoing and talked for ages simply to ensure that she wasn’t left out - and over the next few months he became Phenna’s closest friend. He was already a couple of years into his Starfleet career, being slightly older, and as a result it meant that he already knew the ropes and how things were done. It was such a relief to know someone who knew the structure at the Academy. Their friendship was more than just a safety net though. It was mutual; talking late into the night until Jamie eventually fell asleep, trawling through words and grammar in Standard until she finally got a grasp on it. It was from Jamie that Phenna ended up with that accent that she could never shake despite the years; the lilting, soft-spoken sing-song of someone from the Hebrides.

What was even more amusing was the fact that Jamie was a musician. While Phenna had been immersed in the world of classical singing for all of those years, Jamie was almost the direct opposite in that he pursued folk music. The accordion, fiddle, wooden flute, and bagpipes contrasted heavily with the genre that Phenna had been brought up on… But it was perhaps that contrast which made it even more intriguing. How enlightening it was to pursue something entirely new; something upbeat which conveyed just as much emotion as an opera did but in an entirely different way. The hybrid became the main patron of events put on by Jamie’s traditional folk band and ceilidh after ceilidh were attended by the two.

Of course good things did not last forever. For one there was the fact that Jamie was further ahead in his Academy career than she was, meaning that he was set to graduate when Phenna was only just going into her third year of the six-year medical programme. Then there was the drama that Astren Ephrix decided to create. How the news that her daughter was pursuing folk music managed to get to the Betazoid was a complete mystery but she did find out. For the Ephrix matriarch it seemed like that was the last straw, enough of Phenna’s pointless games and rebellion over the years. Desecrating what could have been a perfect career as an opera singer, firstly with Starfleet and now with this? It simply wouldn’t do - and angry letters would not do either. It was two years into her time at the Academy when Astren decided enough was enough and had her daughter exiled from Betazed. What better method of punishment was there? Despite Phenna’s own efforts to apologise and reconcile they always went unheard; to the extent that she would not meet her younger brother Geonhjikihl until years later, nor be able to wish Astren farewell when the matriarch died.

Despite the hardships Phenna was still determined to power through, knowing that halting due to inconveniences would not get her anywhere in life. While she was rather certain that brushing aside such issues was not a healthy prospect it was all that she knew to do, and the remaining years of her Academy career were spent with an almost scary determination. Placements were met with as much focus and attention as possible, and extracurricular activity was pursued as a very fine distraction. Things undoubtedly would have been easier if Jamie was still there but that awkward gap in between their graduation years had created the issue. The sooner she could get to a proper posting the better, as it meant that she could finally do the work she had intended upon pursuing those years ago. She helped others to fight their way through the coursework too; instilling a classmate with the confidence to get through the exams, helping them to remember the answer… A little bit of Q magic never went amiss. At the end of six years Phenna graduated from Starfleet Academy as a junior doctor, seemingly ready to take on the world - or perhaps the universe, in her case.

Starbase 17
Her first posting was all but a godsend too, the perfect opportunity to do a little more help than what the regular doctor could do. It was with glee that Phenna found herself posted to Starbase 17 - a designated medical facility. It was the perfect environment and all she could have asked for. By day she could go about working away with regular cases and honing her skills, getting to build the rapport with patients and fall into that kindly bedside manner that she would become well known for in the future. In the depths of gamma shift she would then sneak back through the station and identify those who were even more ill. There were people with conditions that could not be resolved, ones who would take a while in treatment and were going to have to endure such pain first. It was not a hardship to take their hand in her own and wish away the pain, repair some damaged organs, or regenerate the cellular degradation which was taking place. Normal cases could be handled legitimately but with these more difficult ones it finally felt like she had the ability to help.

Unfortunately that sort of thing did not get past the station’s administration without being pointed out. Patients with chronic or even terminal illness seemed to miraculously recover overnight, something that was more than definitely not natural. With Starfleet being Starfleet the possibility of some sort of benevolent creature assisting them was soon proposed. Phenna realised swiftly that if she was going to continue this sort of work then she was going to have to learn to be more discreet. It was as such that she learned the trick of starbase-hopping. You would get to one place, work a month or so, and then apply to fill a vacancy elsewhere. It was something that numerous new officers did in order to gain experience so it did not seem too odd of her to want to do the same. While it meant that she could never properly settle down and make friends with the other staff there it meant that she could assist those in need without being caught, and that was what mattered.

While Starfleet theorised and she continued her work to heal as many people as she could, the Q Continuum silently watched over the case and eventually decided to intervene. It was a complete shock to Phenna to find herself frozen in her quarters as she tried to leave for work, mortal form flickering away into tiny pieces of stardust. At this stage Phenna had never altered her form before and it was completely terrifying to feel the sensation of being dragged to somewhere without knowing the destination or of what was happening to you. Starfleet officers were always enthralled by pictures of space and the universe beyond, wishing to be out there on their starship exploring it all. Phenna found that she did not require that safe passage aboard a starship. Instead, she was one part of the giant puzzle that made up the universe - a being of energy, one with the other Q.

The others had been watching for quite some time. To utilise your powers in such an open way was risky for one - and then there were those in the Continuum who criticised the endeavour because of the fact she was helping people. Mortals should have been left to fend for themselves, numerous of these omnipotent beings argued. Humans had almost caused their own destruction and if they were going to lag behind in the technology that could help their own people then so be it. It was not the job of a Q to intervene in such a lesser species. Phenna, obviously, had been rather frustrated by this. What was wrong with putting these abilities to good use and helping people in need? Why was it such a sin to be a good person? No matter the points she argued the Continuum would not listen, hell-bent on that feeling that their own points of views were right and that none other would be accepted. It was as such that they realised a verdict had to be made in order to prevent their young hybrid Q from arguing forever. Either she gave up this ‘mortal’ life and lived with the Continuum where she could utilise her powers but from behind their administration - or she continued with the life she had, but found her powers being capped. It was not a difficult decision. Having never been raised amidst the Continuum left nothing to be desired; and all in all, she rather liked her ‘normal’ life.

The Continuum were unimpressed but begrudgingly let their bringer of life and light back into the world, only this time with her abilities severely capped. Phenna had no reservations about this at the time. If she could not do good by the way of the Continuum then she would do it her own way - traditionally, by going back to what she had been taught and striving to be the best medical officer that she could be. It was because of this determination that she ended up becoming Starfleet’s go-to officer over the years whenever they wanted someone to convene with the other organisations out there to learn of new developments in medicine. Phenna became well known as an avid learner who expanded her knowledge to multiple different branches of medicine, never wanting to be confined to one role and determined to learn as much as she could so she could best help people. Every time there was a conference or a meeting with the likes of the Vulcan Science Academy then she could be found there.

With her powers having been withdrawn she also came to feel as if she had to compensate in some way. No longer could she hear every sound from the chatter of a person nearby to the scuttle of an ant across the ground - no longer could she sense emotion through a message, or feel the movement of the universe just beyond her fingertips. Having something that had been part of her for so long be suddenly removed made it feel as if something was missing. The benefit she had was that she was part Betazoid. It did not take much research into exactly to what extent she should be able to use telepathy and empathy, learning how to push those skills to extremes over the years. It wasn’t exactly healthy, considering how mortal forms weren’t built for that sort of strenuous pressure, but in her opinion it was anything to help fill the void.

USS Opalescence
An unexpected turn in her career that also helped to fill that void was her posting to the USS Opalescence. It was a relatively small ship designed for nothing more than standard patrol but still held a relatively strong tactical team in case they did run into anything - and one of the members of this ship was Jamie Maclaren. Their reunion was a complete surprise but the two of them could not have asked for anything better. Not even having been apart for six years could have burned out that friendship and it was immediately fully rekindled. The support structure they formed was exactly the same as it had been during their time at Starfleet Academy; best friends who could share anything and everything with one another without fear of judgement. It did not take long for the relationship to take the turn it likely would have if they had stayed at the Academy together for longer - entirely inseparable and entwined as true soulmates.

Multiple years in perfect peacefulness were spent aboard the USS Opalescence. Trying to hide who she was or to bridge the gap when her powers had been removed had been her main focus for so long and both of which had been a chore. It was different here - she was finally happy. But it was just typical that happiness never seemed to stay, instead giving way to yearning. Time and time again she found herself enraptured by the fact that, no matter how much she tried to pretend, she was never going to be entirely normal. It was something that she strived for; to be just like the others, to have a successful career and a happy life and- to have a family. Family was something that she lacked, not having spoken to her mother in years, and the height of everyone’s existence came with the foundation of a proper family, did it not? Neither herself nor Jamie had been interested in getting married, content to remain within the universe’s ties as soulmates instead of putting some outdated vow upon it… And when she eventually plucked up the courage to speak to Jamie about it, she found that he felt the same. What they wanted was family.

'Research Sabbatical'
At the time Starfleet did not accommodate people who wished to pursue that sort of thing. The fleet was very much career-oriented or nothing at all - it wasn’t until many years forward and by the insistence of a certain hybrid that families became allowed aboard starships for the first time. It was thus that when she found out she was pregnant Phenna bid farewell to the USS Opalescence, taking leave under the guise of a sabbatical and heading home to Jamie Maclaren’s residence upon the Isle of Skye. Maclaren himself opted to stay within the fleet - there was no point in them both halting their careers - but with every shore leave he returned home as soon as he possibly could.

Life on Skye was perfect. It was all that Phenna had ever wanted. She had her career in the background and now she was going to have a family of her own. Murphy’s Law seemed content to strike again, though, as it tended to with Starfleet officers. For a time she felt as if it must be the Continuum purposefully toying with her, determined to show that this ‘normal’ way of life wouldn’t work and that they could prove her wrong. Scans highlighted the difficulties, genetic markers pinging up and showing that things were not all right. The guilt was immense; that somehow this might have been her fault, or that if she had fought with the Continuum to retain her abilities then she would be able to fix this sort of thing. After multiple conversations with Jamie - ones that she barely got through, on the verge of breaking down every time - the two of them decided that they were not going to give up on this child. As long as they wouldn’t live in any sort of pain, that was what mattered… And they were going to give them as best a chance at life as possible. Everybody deserved that no matter what.

Seann Maclaren was born on the 1st of October, 2316. It was evident from the off that this was going to be an uphill battle. Months upon months were spent hidden away in one of Earth’s hospitals, never seeing anything other than the NICU and PICU. It was such a horrible contrast: going from the side where you were working to fix issues like this to being incapable and resigned to only watch and hope. Months seemed to blend into one until after eight full months young Seann was discharged and finally allowed to head home, only because his mother had the knowledge to look after him in a medical capacity. Days and nights alike were spent looking after the child and there wasn’t a single moment when Phenna felt safe to tear her gaze away, terrified that something would go wrong.

As he grew, however, things began to settle down a tad. Sleepless nights turned into at least a few peaceful hours. This time was spent wisely. In those twilight hours Phenna delved into genetic research, determined to help her son in any way possible. Conventional medicine had not proven to be of any help with Seann’s fragile form rejecting anything that was attempted. Those genetic markers that had shown up in the initial scans seemed to be burned into her memory. On Denobula this would have been entirely legal, with how distanced they were from the Federation they had been allowed to continue their genetic research without any issue. Being a Starfleet officer made it more difficult, and being a Starfleet officer on Earth made things even worse. Year upon year she presented her research - research which would have worked - and year after year she was sent away. Earth refused to change because of their history and their Eugenics Wars. People like Seann were resigned to suffer when they could have been saved.

As the years moved on and they rejected her work it also meant that the years moved on for Seann. The young boy never learned to talk, completely non-verbal and communicating by twisted facial expressions and hand actions as best he could. He was incapable of walking, limbs contorted, never taking the first step that other parents looked forward to so dearly. The poor child could not even breathe unaided, relegated to being on continuous support. Despite it all, he felt no pain. The only emotion ever detectable from him was joy. He adored the times when Jamie would come home and the three of them would go on walks down the beach and watch the sunsets together - and those were always the times that Seann seemed to be most at peace. Despite it all, he was happy.

His parents were the opposite. No matter how well they concealed it whilst around their son there was no hiding the tension from one another. There was Phenna’s continuous guilt that she couldn’t do more - a mother, doctor, and a Q completely incapable of intervening to save her own son. Countless prayers were put out in the hopes that even the rest of the Continuum might hear; help him, help them, let his powers activate or give her own back or… Anything. Jamie’s guilt from having pursued his Starfleet career further instead of opting to return was overwhelming - and as Seann’s condition deteriorated over the years until that final fateful day, that career decision of Jamie’s proved to be their downfall.

Phenna had known it was going to happen. There had been… Something different. She may not have been able to sense those intricate changes in the universe anymore but she was certain there was something then; the warmth draining from the world, the light seeming to go out. Jamie hadn’t been there. He had been deployed at the time, leaving her alone with Seann. A look at the young boy confirmed it all - the worry that radiated from him instead of the joy. She wasn’t going to have that. Her son was going to go in peace. She had pushed his wheelchair down into the sands as the sun sunk lower, bathing the sky in its orange glow. You’re allowed to go, she told Seann, holding his hand and trying to keep her voice from wavering - a final act of strength for him. ''You don’t have to fight, darling. You’ve been so strong for us. We love you so, so much. It’s alright… It’s alright.''

Seann Maclaren died in the April of 2323 - at spring time which had always been his favourite, aged seven, and enveloped in the sun’s golden glow. Phenna had stood there completely despondent for what seemed like hours but was only a matter of minutes until a clinical efficiency kicked in. The time of death was reported and a medical examiner summoned along with the undertaker. Jamie was contacted on a priority frequency and told to return to Earth as soon as possible. She had remained upon the beach. Seann was taken away. She couldn’t remember moving - everything seemed to blend together into some sort of haze - until the next thing she properly focussed on was being inside their home. There had been Jamie almost breaking down the door to get in, voice frantic as he demanded to know what was going on. Her expression said it all. There had been Jamie’s own expression, going from panic to desolation and seeming to shatter in an instant. Another blank in her memory and then they were both there crumpled in front of the sofa, seemingly having caved and sunk to the floor - arms wrapped around one another, her head upon his shoulder, sobbing having turned silent as time seemed to tick on and on and on.

Those days after Seann’s death were like a waking nightmare. Phenna had dedicated a full seven years to tending to her son; every minute of every day was dedicated to looking after him. Everything seemed wrong now. There would be attempts to distract herself which ended up being interrupted at certain hours which were all but programmed into her head by now - when to get him up for the day, when to change his stoma or give him his medication. Not doing all of this felt wrong. Seven years had been set to a routine and now there was no routine left at all. Days and nights seemed to blend into one without that regimental timing to it all. Somehow the funeral seemed to take forever to reach and simultaneously arrived instantaneously. It was only a short service - so few knew of Seann’s existence that it was only a couple of family members of Jamie’s that attended - and even that seemed to be over in no time at all.

It was as if time was taunting them. Maybe it was, knowing the abilities of the rest of the Continuum. That line of thinking had started off as something small but swiftly developed into a full paranoia; that they might be watching, that they might have caused all of this. Every moment was spent enveloped in pure guilt at the fact she hadn’t been able to help despite being one of the Continuum’s number. The fact seemed to eat away at her until it was all that she could think about - and eventually, until she could not withhold the truth from Jamie any longer. It was upon the same beach where Seann had passed that she ended up confessing to Jamie, starting off meek until her words were a string of unprocessed thought and pure confession. Everything was conveyed to him - how she should have been able to help Seann, how his self-healing might well have activated if they had just had a little more time, how all of those years she had been concealing the truth about who she really was. Afterwards Phenna had stood there, awaiting a reaction; and all Jamie did was turn and walk away.

In that instant their relationship had shattered. Attempts to call Jamie in the coming days were met with a dial tone at the other end. It seemed as if their love for one another did not transcend their love for their son. It was in a complete form of despondency that Phenna re-entered Starfleet afterwards, putting an end to that ‘research sabbatical’ and awaiting a posting again. It seemed as if it was the only thing that she could do. All of those years had been spent hiding the fact she was pursuing a family, just because she wanted to maintain her career… And now she had no form of emotion when she re-entered the fleet, completely numb to it all. There was no proper reaction to being part of a team aboard a Starship again. There was no proper reaction to said team saving a poisoned ambassadorial party, no reaction to being awarded the Starfleet Silver Palm as a result. An entire year seemed to tick on while feeling completely numb to the world.

And on the anniversary of one year exactly she could be found upon that beach once more, having pulled some strings to acquire shore leave for the week surrounding that time. She had been staring out at the boats past the lighthouse and genuinely contemplating how she was meant to carry on like this when she caught the sense of an emotional aura that she hadn’t detected in almost a year. It seemed as if James Maclaren had had the same idea as her in heading out to that beach once more. Phenna could have left. She could have walked away, she could have ran, she could have screamed at Jamie and threw every obscenity under the sun at him with the weight of the entire universe behind it - but she didn’t. Instead it was like being drawn in but not to fight, both of them approaching- and then arms had wrapped around one another, sinking almost immediately like in a exact reimagining of the day that Jamie had come home.

From there onwards things seemed to pick up a little bit. It was a slow process, trying to re-learn how to think and feel and interact instead of just being completely numb to the world. But it was one that Phenna knew was necessary - and one that made her a better person. What sort of doctor were you if you could not empathise with your patient, if you could not feel for their struggle and properly know what they were going through? It took quite some time but slowly and surely she managed to settle back into proper normalcy again. It was an act of working away as she had done before but this time being aware of everything - of acknowledging, processing, and moving on. Jamie was a godsend yet again in this regard. Countless apologies had been given that day on the beach and they had forgiven one another in almost an instant. They had gone through their time to grieve and it was about time that they supported one another through it instead. Despite being posted to different places they were still inseparable; conversations being held over the subspace, coordinating shore leaves to meet on starbases. With one another they managed to claw their way back to proper living again, each finding the other to be their saving grace.

USS Petrichor
Falling back into medical work proved to be the perfect routine. Work had been her distraction for so long and instead of just using it as that method she now learned to hone in on it. Starfleet Medical’s system was so outdated that it meant that communication between different ships took far too long. Medical developments were being made every day and people should be informed immediately so work could be cross-examined and re-tested and published, but things were being held up. They needed a method that enabled proper cohesion between every medical department to make sure that the most up-to-date information was being given to everybody - it was necessary, really, because such a thing could help to save a life. Despite only being an Assistant Chief Medical Officer at this stage she began to observe the bigger picture and strived to make changes, starting with an internal forum and then expanding outwards to include the creation of numerous medical journal archives which could possibly even contain the work of organisations external to Starfleet.

Atop the work to make their system more cohesive there was also her efforts to change the system for the rest of Starfleet, too. If her years of looking after Seann had taught her anything it was that Starfleet was far too outdated in its approach to families within the fleet. People could serve aboard a starship for up to five years at a time and never see their homeworld. How could they be expected to spend such time away from their family? And how could an officer be expected to halt or even give up their career in order to pursue such a desire - something that was just a part of life, something that everybody was entitled to? Starfleet still had that horrid trend of forcing people to forego their career or put it on hold (potentially with disastrous consequences) if they wanted to have children. The journey to have this system changed was not an easy one - it had to include masses of research into the dangers of raising a child aboard a starship, the advantages and disadvantages, how you would handle keeping children in such an environment - but eventually she got there. Starfleet’s HR department had been a little bit floored by the fact that one officer had created masses of information in an attempt to get the system changed… But it was also appreciated. It meant that they didn’t have to do the work themselves, and with that began the slow switch for families to be allowed within Starfleet.

And amidst the administrative ideas and attempts to change the system - something that had gone from irritating the Admiralty to amusing them because it meant that their work was being handled for them - she continued regular work within the medical bay. It was one of the both benefits and downsides of being part-Denobulan. Sleep had always been a difficulty to her. The only method she found that functioned was to work away for weeks on end and then completely KO for one or two days straight… Not exactly healthy for the majority of species but apparently fine for the hybrid. With a schedule completely full it seemed as if time flew by. Maybe it did; you could never know when the rest of the Continuum may have been interfering. That little paranoia never seemed to truly leave. Phenna learned to ignore it, though, immersed in work as always. She had no true desire for progression but for someone so dedicated it only seemed natural that she would end up promoted and serving within the ranks of the senior staff. She couldn’t complain - at least there was always something to do.

USS Nascence
In 2366 she had found herself serving as Chief Medical Officer aboard the USS Nascence. By some miracle it was the same ship that Jamie had been posted to, him serving there as the CTO. One of the issues that had begun to plague them in those later years was the concept of age. Phenna was 78 but looked to be only in her thirties, those genetic traits creating both an advantage and disadvantage. Jamie, on the other hand, was 79. His hair had gone grey, he had grown weary, and the only thing keeping him active was medical intervention and a steely determination. She had never admitted it to him but watching him age was painful… And so was the knowledge that she would lose Jamie to the concept of advancing time and she would be stuck here without him.

Sooner rather than later occurred. With a bit of coaxing from the rest of the crew. Commander James Maclaren had finally decided that on his 80th birthday he would retire. Of course he would not leave the fleet without a show, and it was as such that he all but declared that their awaiting first-contact mission would be conducted by himself. There had been hopes of it being peaceful. There had hopes of it going perfectly well without a single casualty or phaserbolt being fired. Wishful thinking had no part in Starfleet, though, and Murphy’s Law once again seemed to kick in upon that last away mission. The people upon the planet turned out to be hostile, attempting to lure the Starfleet officers in and raid the shuttlecraft for their gear. The officers would have been swift to prevent this had it not been for the intense psionic attack that drilled into their minds - only being rescued by an Aenar member of their team who had been capable of withstanding the attack.

The away team were taken to sickbay in varying states of disarray. Some were unconscious, others in shock - and then there was Jamie, seemingly conscious but entirely vacant, not responding at all. If you had a personal connection to a patient then you weren’t supposed to get in the way. Either you could remain entirely professional or you could hand the case over to somebody else. The latter was what the majority opted for - it was easier that way. In Jamie’s case, however, that was not an option. As soon as he had been taken in she had sensed that horrid change to his mental state, one that said he was there, but… Not there. Vacant, but only partially, trapped inside his own mind. Phenna was the only one trained in telepathic intervention. It was so rare and only used in the most dire of circumstances to the extent that she had only ever utilised it once before, and that was only to alter a patient’s emotional state and calm them down. It was the only option this time, there was no other method; and so focussing on the man before her - the one person who meant everything to her - she delved into his mind.

It didn’t work. The natives of that planet possessed psionic abilities that far outmatched her own. She could feel the change as soon as their minds became one - Jamie’s shutting down, the light going out. Backtracking wasn’t an option in the fear it would cause more damage and instead she was resigned to just watch, sensing the panic and feel the sensation of her partner’s mind going dark. No attempt to fight through that mental barrier seemed to work, no word of reassurance even managed to break past the fear. And it was entirely enveloped in that fear that Jamie died. Phenna relinquished their connection and could only watch on in horror as red contrasted with the dark tone of Jamie’s skin; blood dripping from his nose, cerebrospinal fluid from his ears, and then there was the final look of desperation in his eyes as his brain shut down. It had been on auto-pilot that she had made an attempt to move and drag over the crash cart and find the neural regenerator, anything that could help, anything that could stop that horrid flat tone from ringing out throughout the medical bay- but instead she was grasped around the waist by the ACMO and swiftly dragged away, leaving James Maclaren to the hands of officers who knew there was no way to revive him.

With Seann’s death there had at least been a reaction. With Jamie’s there wasn’t one at all, seeming to be in some sort of haze that separated herself from the world. Having been there when he died was one thing. Having been inside his head - sensing that fear - was another. And potentially being the cause of it, considering how everything had come crashing down as soon as she had intervened? That was the worst part of all, one that seemed impossible to move past - and Starfleet had the same opinion, too. It was with not a single shred of emotion that she went through the court martial, never putting any thought into what was going on. Responses to questions had been pre-written by a solicitor from the JAG Corps. It meant she didn’t have to think. If Starfleet were content to lock her away for manslaughter and medical malpractice then at least she wouldn’t have to face the interior of a medical bay again, she would never have to think about that day again-

But she was acquitted for the crime, the court understanding that telepathic intervention had been a last resort and every effort to save Commander James Maclaren had been done. From there she had to return to work. The other officers were entirely supportive, aware that Maclaren’s death had not been her fault. It was her own guilt that plagued her for so long, though. Setting foot inside of the medical bay that she ran was genuinely agonising, the weight of the emotional energy there being too overpowering. On the very first day that she returned to the Nascence she immediately requested a transfer. It was denied. Starfleet had never been particularly good with handling this sort of thing - trauma was left to the individual to deal with. There was still that regimental military mindset after so many years of change and it was as such that Phenna was effectively told to ‘get over it and get on with it,’ leaving her to force herself back into routine once more.

Starfleet Psychosocial Support Network
The event that knocked her out of that strange stupor she found herself in was the Battle of Wolf 359 in 2367. Starfleet were helpless as the Borg cube tore through their space. Once the devastation was over it was the job of Starfleet’s medical vessels to pick through the remains of the starships which had been destroyed and see if anything had been left behind. They were too late to the majority of cases, beaming aboard officers who were already dead. As part of away teams they trawled through sections of vessels which were still intact, doing headcounts and marking down names and ID numbers so their families could at least be alerted. Some officers were found alive, hidden within escape-crafts or pinned under the rubble aboard their starship. It was them who the officers trawled through; tagging them with red, orange, never a green card in sight - and the majority around them were tagged with black. Running triage for such a disaster was one of the worst things that a medical officer would ever have to do, and it was with an almost scary dedication and determination that Phenna Ephrix worked.

The worst part came in the days, weeks, and months after the initial battle. Those few remaining vessels were hauled home to be patched up. Officers were stabilised and then returned to Earth for further treatment. Next of kin were informed, mass funerals were held, and the entirety of the Federation mourned. What was perhaps the most concerning was the state of those who had served as the first response to the event. Officers who had fought there were treated like heroes, given shore leave and encouraged to band together in that shared suffering that Starfleet was so well known for. The medical officers did not have this same sort of recognition. They had been behind the front lines. They had been the ones who picked through the bodies, who saved those they could, who determined who lived and who died based on those horrible triage cards of black, red, orange and green. They had been left to wallow in guilt, incapable of processing it for themselves, and there wasn’t a single offer from Starfleet of how to take away their anguish.

Most people learned to live with it. The majority forced themselves to move on, but for some it was just too much. It was after the suicide of a young nurse named Taisrav that Phenna’s own anguish turned into frustration instead - and then to determination. Starfleet’s system was not good enough. There was no support for any of these officers. They were all mourning and what was the only available help? One counsellor allocated to each shift who could hardly handle the workload, never mind handle the emotion of every single member of the crew. If she had been good at anything in this almost-hundred years so far it was at identifying when the system needed changed. With a knowledge of psychology and psychiatry already obtained from previous courses it did not take too much to re-train as a counsellor. Running a medical bay and working away at this project without assistance took up almost all of her free time. Not that she required free time any more. In previous years it would have been spent looking after Seann or speaking with Jamie. Those days were far behind her now, though, and so it was unsurprising that pursuing such a project consumed all of her waking hours.

Recruitment drives from within medical and from outside of the fleet itself were conducted. A civilian partnership programme was launched in order to attract trained counsellors, psychologists, and psychiatrists alike from outside the fleet. They didn’t have to go anywhere, remaining planetside; but they served as a non-biased source of comfort for those in need. Counselling staff were re-distributed properly to different vessels so they had more than one poor member of staff. At least one person per shift was the minimum, and with the recruitment drives and civilians being brought in it meant that this quota could finally be filled.

The Dominion War was the next spanner in the works. Starfleet’s rearranged number of counsellors saw a dramatic increase in people requiring their assistance. No longer was their support going to just medical officers but extending to everybody else. It was due to this that their training was furthered. Forgoing her position as a Chief Medical Officer, Phenna returned to Earth - promoted and granted a posting at Starfleet Medical to properly conduct this overhaul from there. The system went from being entirely broken and unable to support the fleet to being a fully-fledged network of counsellors, psychologists, and psychiatrists all trained to help. If one person couldn’t assist then there was always another instead, a remote system being set up with some coordination from Operations. And if there was ever an awkward case then the hybrid herself never hesitated to get involved, determined to help. Times not spent at her office in Medical’s Tait Wing were spent aboard a starship, filling a posting if they had a low count of medical officers or if something in particular had happened to that crew. It took a fair while to set up, the entire project spanning the length of five years, but eventually Starfleet’s new Psychosocial Support Network was entirely functional.

United Federation Humanitarian Committee
The network was her main project until 2385 when there was the announcement that Romulus was in danger of being destroyed by a star potentially going supernova. Starfleet had immediately been mobilised to help in evacuation efforts, encouraged by the more kindhearted in the fleet that this could be the beginning of better relations with the Romulans… And that leaving them to fend for themselves would be entirely immoral and against Starfleet’s code of conduct. The evacuations were halted with the attack on Mars. In an instant all of those vessels were recalled to help rescue their own. When the efforts on Mars were over and the planet left to burn Starfleet was not sent back out to Romulan space, however. The entirety of the fleet seemed to be in upheaval. They were going against their word and their principles by refusing to assist the Romulans any further, they were going against people’s right to life by enacting a ban on synthetic lifeforms - and alike many other officers at the time, Phenna Ephrix refused to stand for it. Some like Admiral Jean-Luc Picard resigned. Others took to the streets in open protest and were swiftly punished for it. It seemed as if there was no way to convince the fleet to turn around from this ruling, as anti-Starfleet as it was.

Being sent away from Medical to serve aboard Starbase 027 was supposed to be a punishment but instead the hybrid took it in her stride. Running a starbase was practically a walk in the park considering how she had been running the entirety of Starfleet’s counselling team. The fact that they had abandoned Romulus was still a frustration and numerous letters of protest were sent to the Admiralty - every single one was ignored. It seemed that when she was doing their work for them then they were quite content to listen to her, but if she was questioning their work then they weren’t willing to listen. Everything came to a complete escalation in 2387 when the Hobus supernova did in fact occur, completely destroying both Romulus and Remus.

Starfleet were all but contractually obligated to respond and see if they could assist with settling those who had managed to escape. The Romulans were not particularly pleased with the intervention considering how the fleet had abandoned them before: their help had come too late. And besides, Starfleet was barely even in a position to help at all. The destruction of Utopia Planitia had left them without the main shipyard and production had all but ground to a halt. Ships were scattered here and there and nobody had been ready to deploy, and as a result, the provision of aid to Romulus was more of a shambles than anything.

Of course this was all observed from Starbase 027. Phenna was well known for her ability to never properly become angry but even she found complete frustration in the fact that Starfleet had done nothing to assist the Romulan and Reman population. What was even worse was the fact that they had barely been equipped. What if such a disaster had occurred within Federation space and the Admiralty had wanted a team to attend? It still wouldn’t have been possible considering how ill-equipped they were. And thus began her new project: ensuring that there was a set group of vessels ready to deploy at all times for the provision of aid following a disaster of that sort of magnitude.

It was easy to keep this confined to medical vessels. They were the ones already trained. They knew triage, medicine, counselling and how to distribute provisions. It did not take long to study different ship schematics and band them all together in order to create a designated medical response fleet. The Pasteur, Inglis, Chakara, Xichun, Sinoussi, Franklin, and flagship Dunant were her starships of choice. Empty staffing positions were filled, captains and first officers were interviewed in order to ensure that they were right for the job. They were going to change over the years, of course - as would the ships, multiple of them having to take a trip through the alphabet to gain a replacement due to the first being destroyed - but the foundations were there. By 2400 the United Federation Humanitarian Committee had been founded,  bringing both Starfleet and civilians alike together to assist others in times of crisis.

And it was lucky that they had been founded, too, considering the number of times they were deployed in the years afterwards. From natural disasters to a starship crash, there never seemed to be a moment where the fleet managed to get a break. It was thankful that they had seven ships in total within their number, meaning that another pair could be deployed if the rest were still trying to recuperate from an event. Phenna was more than content to oversee the work of the UFHC and the Psychosocial Network. Medical had finally opted to give her office back but the majority of time she could be found out in the field with one of the ships. If there was some sort of emergency response required then she could be found attending with the UFHC, leading work out in the field and ensuring her officers were alright. In the very rare downtime she would then remain aboard vessels outside the UFCH, normally ones which had been through some sort of traumatic instance and needed that extra counsellor aboard. Office work was the bane of her existence - field work was her forte.

Starfleet Medical
In the years that passed she did eventually learn to return to Starfleet Medical more, though, pushed by promotions and finding that she had to attend to work as a junior member of the admiralty as well. From time to time she would give herself a posting out to a starship even if just for a few weeks, but the majority of her time was spent upon Earth from then on. It wasn’t something she completely despised. Her time was still filled wisely; running the UFHC, the psychosocial network, taking a teaching position at the Academy, convening with the Admiralty, conducting the Academy’s choir… The only reason she managed to get through it all where others might have faltered was due to a complete disliking of free time. Being productive was her only way of compensating for the change she could have been enacting if she had been allowed to retain her proper abilities as a Q. Working was her only way of changing things, of influencing the system, of carrying things out legitimately instead of cheating. It was just her way of life. And besides - remaining busy served as a perfect distraction. Age was a downside in that you had to watch those around you fade away, person after person, friend after friend. Distraction became as much a companion as they were too.

Years passed and more projects were worked on. That ever-so-slightly rebellious streak that was intrinsic to all Q continued and every year she continued to present her papers on genetic research. At every conference the idea was rejected and threats of her demotion thrown in alongside it. She never cared about the threats, though. The prospect of changing things and ensuring that people could be treated for issues that were fixable was all she cared about. Courses were written and classes given such as to help parents understand children who were non-verbal, for example, taking information from her own experience and that of others to help these others create a better familial relationship. In 2448 she ended up briefly serving as the Surgeon General until dropping the position three weeks later due to frustration that she was no longer able to serve out in the field. Dissertations and papers were produced here and there in regards to telepathic intervention. After the instance with Jamie’s death she was very tempted to hide away from that remaining fragment of her abilities but instead she opted to delve into it - if she could hone the skill and conduct further research then it meant that instead of causing harm, she would be able to help.

How funny it was that all of her research into telepathic intervention would cause the beginning of her downfall. For years one of those internal questions had been exactly how mortal this ‘mortal’ form was. She could suffer from medical conditions, she could fall ill - and noticeably, she could age, but at a far slower rate than she should have as somebody with hybrid genetics. Self-healing had a habit of kicking in if she was ever wounded too badly. How long would that keep up for, though? Over time she had noticed herself becoming more susceptible to the downside of telepathy; migraines from reading overwhelming emotional auras, for example, or an inability to hold a telepathic connection for as long as she used to be able to. It was after assisting a poor Intelligence officer with the remnants of a katra inside of her head that the downfall properly kicked in - part of her brain effectively shorting out from the strain.

It was thought that the Admiral would have succumbed to the damage done but instead she somehow clawed her way back. The result seemed to be blindness and her left side failing her, effectively becoming hemiplegic. After that it seemed to be issue after issue, the year 2477 gearing up to become her own personal year from Hell. There was accidental emotional projection and psionically wounding a group of officers during a mental break, being manipulated by her Mirror counterpart in order to connect with Starfleet’s telepaths and slowly attempt to wear them down. The creation of a telepathic relay network powered by her own brain wasn’t something she had ever considered before - nor was telepathic illusion - and she found that she didn’t want to consider them ever again because the skills had been created by the counterpart who had caused so much strife. There was being stabbed by one of Starfleet’s officers in order to stop her, there were countless attempts to recover and regain the ability to walk or see anything more than muted colours-

And instead, everything got worse. Utilising that telepathic relay once more in a time of true crisis did more damage to her brain than she could have ever imagined. All of that work to recover was snuffed out in an instant and this time her hearing went with it; completely deafblind and hemiplegic. It was during restorative surgery and the fitting auditory brainstem implants that her brain decided it was the perfect time to enact self-healing, the worst damaged sections seeming to repair. Post-surgery it had led to a couple of questions, of course, and thus came the confession to her good friend Wash that she was a Q.

It had been years since she had confessed it to anybody else. In fact, the last person had been Jamie. It might have been good to confide in another person had Wash been completely and utterly incapable of holding his tongue. How typical it was that the Tellarite mentioned it in passing to a couple of students, thinking that they would never believe it… Only to have them tell another, and them tell somebody else, until the rumour had expanded and ended up all the way to the Tal Shiar. The organisation was loath to let an opportunity pass them by and it was just her luck that she found herself kidnapped by them, completely incapable of doing anything to stop them due to her powers having been taken from her. All she had known was the sensation of being torn apart, mortal form rapidly losing cohesion and giving way to the Continuum’s being of pure light and life instead.

There was a distinct gap in her memory, then, until the Tal Shiar’s device was powered down and the crew of the USS Phoenix managed to get her out. It was with immense guilt that she had to look upon the state of Mol’Rihan and witness the devastation that she had caused - not her, but still her, it was hard to distinguish the two. Setting things right was a given, being confronted by the Continuum afterwards was entirely expected - but what wasn’t expected was the ability to go back to regular everyday life after all of this. The guilt remained and the worry of how people would react now that they know what she never faded.

Ephrix passed away on the 1st of November 2477 within the grounds of Starfleet Medical - a place that she had devoted countless years to.